As I studied the lines in
the wooded ceiling above
my head, I thought of a simple statement,
so I reached for my notepad.
After unlocking my phone, I went straight
to the notes app. My eyes squinting from
the harsh light, I began to type away.
'Relationships are not for me. I was
never that eight year old dreaming
about my wedding. I had never given
thought about a wedding. Not because
I never wanted it, but I had other priorities
and dreams. Dating has never excited me.
Rather than feeling excitement, I feel nothing
but anxiety, fear and questions. Therefore,
I am content to be single the rest of my life.
Feeling relieved, I clicked done in the upper
corner and swiped away the notes app, put
away my device and went to sleep.
I have not had the best experiences
when it comes to relationships. Let me
lay out some examples to help you better
understand. From being dumped because
you will not kiss, being stalked, to guys simply
putting on a good show for a while.
After my most recent relationship,
I was convinced I was done. I told myself I would
never again take neither the time or dedication to
let anyone in. Why coach a player over and over
again if they keep making the same mistakes in the game
humiliating you? Why go through the exhaustion and
great disappointment?
A good friend told me I should
not be bitter because when relationships
are done God's way, they are amazing. I
looked into my good friend's eyes and
emptily asked, "How can I want something
I never had?'
In other words, your not going to crave
that vanilla bean Starbucks drink unless you
have tasted it and liked it. Therefore, it will
not bother you if you never try it.
God has opened my eyes to a lot recently.
First, it is unfair for us to make a generalized
statement purely based on opinion. How can
I claim there are no good Godly guys, when I
have not personally met all the men in the world?
If I made this claim, that would mean I would be
calling people like my dad and brother a liar,
because they are both in relationships. I know
hands down, these men love and serve selflessly.
Lastly, God designed marriage and he wants us to have it.
I know deep down, I have always wanted to get married. I want
to binge watch romance movies until 1a.m. cuddled with my spouse.
I want to do dirty yard work alongside my
husband. I want to encourage him after he has been let go
or when finances are tight. Most of all, I want my husband and
I to grow closer to God as one.
Key to Remember:
Sometimes a heartbreak or emotional week will be God's plan for us. He does not plan
for us to hurt, but He knows much growth will take place after that heart break.
Takeaway Q:
Are you willing to wait to meet that special person? Why or why not? Is your final answer through a Godly lens, or a worldly one?
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